“It’s a God damned good thing they wasn’t nobody in it.”

“God damned? It’s a God blessed thing, ya’ ijut.” Ray pauses to chew on some whiskers in his mustache. “And God wouldna’ had to be involved with it had they had a damn building permit like they shoulda’!”

That catches Vic’s attention, who has just sat down to the bar and hasn’t ordered yet. “They didn’t have a building permit for that church?”

Ray just says, “Where you been?”

And the Idiot just replies, “That’s sep-ration of church ‘n’ state, Ray. Gov’ment’s got no business inspectin’ a church.”

“G. Zus Christ, Jimmy. You ain’t got the good sense God gave a ferret.”

“What? Is that like a rat?”

The Cannon Brew Pub is a long room with the short side set along Broadway. The bar faced the brewing equipment in the back and was short too, with only six stools. Vic liked it because around about four o’clock you could sit with your back to the bar and see the sunlight and good people strolling out about in it without having to be a part of the whole stupid mess. The place got its name from a brass-plated cannon that sat near the front and had once been part of the old Fort Benning nearby.

“And guess what else I read in the old Ledger-Enqurier, Mr. Hauser?”

Vic doesn’t say a word. Stupid nosy cub reporters.

“‘Drug addicts’ car crashes into Hauser Hardware proprieter Vic Hauser’s home late Thursday night.’ Well, how ’bout that? Guess you had an excitin’ evenin’.”

“There’s nothin’ excitin’ about that you dimwit.”

Ray hits the Idiot in the shoulder and wrinkles his nose. “Nothin’ exciting ’bout a car smashin’ into your house.” The Idiot nods.

“Got a whole mess a paperwork ta fill out fer the insurance is all I got.”

“Nothin’ excitin’ ever happens to ol’ Hauser,” Ray laments.

“What would you know, ya’ vagrant.” Just then the bartender comes over and stands in front of Vic. Just behind him, over his shoulder reads a sign that says,

The Rules:
1. The bartender is always right
2. If the bartender is wrong, see Rule #1

“Get me a beer, Nelson, before these hippies and waywards drive my business out the door.”

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